May 22, 2013 in Spirituality
When it seems as though our lives are spinning out of control and we feel that we have no choice but to surrender and accept it, there is a better, more effective and empowering option! ¬†The law of detachment is just as important as the law of attraction. By breaking the “prison” of conventional thinking we give ourselves the gift of emotional freedom and control. By consciously¬†practicing¬†it each day we raise our vibrations and bring ourselves that much closer to fulfilling our unlimited potential.
On another note, don’t forget to check into the groups or activity, let us get to know you and is there anyone who wants to write a post?¬†
Emotions have a physical and¬†psychological¬†impact that can’t be ignored. ¬†Our perceptions and our emotional responses precede our thoughts, our moods and finally, our actions. ¬†All emotions stem from either love or fear.
Once we learn the art of detachment from fear based emotions we take back control of our lives and we begin the process of thriving instead of simply surviving.
Shame and Guilt
Shame and guilt are the two greatest offenders that block us from accepting ourselves unconditionally. They can both be extremely¬†debilitating, creating an inner sense of “I’m not worthy and everyone can see that I’m flawed.” ¬†It often manifests in that inner dialogue where we negatively evaluate almost each and every action that we take, and words that we say. ¬†Detaching isn’t the same thing as escaping reality, it’s¬†accepting the experiences of your past without judgement or labeling of yourself so that you can move on.
Frustration and Disappointment
When you’re frustrated, there’s two¬†possibilities,¬†you can realize that it’s an opportunity to change your¬†strategy and then you can¬†learn to detach from the outcome. ¬†Disappointment usually means that the game’s over, when that happens we learn from our errors and then we detach from the outcome.
Powerlessness and Anxiety
These are unsettling times, the economy,¬†warfare, etc. ¬†Similar to the other emotional states, we gain freedom when we detach from what we can not control, as well as the outcome. ¬†The final step in gaining emotional freedom from anxiety is to remind ourselves that we’re in the here and now by focusing on what’s okay and certain in the present moment while taking some deep breathes.
The law of detachment doesn’t mean that life will become effortless, it’s being committed to changing, it’s holding¬†yourself to the highest standards possible, competing with yourself even, making your performance even better than the day that it was before; by doing that consistently, you’ll have no choice but to see progress!
When it comes to expectations, detaching isn’t always the right path. ¬†The only time that I feel that it’s appropriate to detach from expectations, is when they’re negative ones. ¬†Other peoples expectations of you will alter your behavior and life (to an extent) if you allow it, you’re in control, choose to detach when it’s hurting you! ¬†The rule of expectations, is that people will most often rise or fall in order to meet the expectations that others have of them. There is a tremendous power of persuasion that comes into play when we use expectations that can and will shift and change your reality. ¬†Think about your life and certain expectations that you’ve had, can you see how your expectations have an ironic way of manifesting themselves? ¬†As parents, partners, friends, and co-workers, we all have the power to influence reality with and through integrity; it’s a big responsibility! ¬†Are you¬†committed to creating a positive change in your life?¬† When creating your expectations, keep in mind that expectations are like beliefs, and will change your behavior and thoughts on both a conscious and subconscious level- which is how the dynamics of “the secret” work.
Inner detachment is like being given an immunity vaccination to what other people think of you. ¬†Here’s a personal example, when my first daughter was 5 and in kindergarten, the teacher approached me, she told me that someone that I had grown up with was working in the school (a former “partner in crime”`). ¬†I had a full blown¬†panic¬†attack, I felt frozen, as though my “mask” was going to be ripped off and for the rest of that week, I imagined all the sordid tales from my past that my old¬†acquaintance¬†was telling people. ¬†I felt that I was about to be “found out” as only¬†masquerading as¬†the stable “role model” responsible parent that I was trying so hard to be. Shame, guilt, and remorse¬†plagued¬†me until I had that final blessed “aha” moment, that my reality and my identity were not defined by my past or the emotions that came with it and their opinion of me was absolutely none of my business.
The Emotional Detaching Process
1. ¬†Anytime that you feel an intense negative emotion rising, stop and pay attention to how it makes your body feel.
2. ¬†Be fully present and imagine that emotion as an energy flowing through your body.
3. ¬†Repeat the affirmation to yourself that your emotions are a state of being, but you are not your emotions.
4. ¬†Release the energy of that emotion. ¬†If you find yourself resisting, it could be that you need to actively express it through whatever form of creativity that you choose.
A particularly helpful¬†exercise¬†that I’ve found is to go into a state of self¬†hypnosis¬†through relaxation techniques which include deep breathing and contracting each muscle as hard as you can for 5 seconds and then letting go. ¬†Give the emotion that you wish to detach from a colour, repeat steps 1-4 above, see and feel it leaving your body. ¬†If that’s not enough, you could try imagining that you’re walking on a beach and that your spirit guide gives you the power to fly, but before you’re allowed to fly, you must give each one of your negative issues a weight, and wear them on your back. Then, in your minds eye, take a couple of steps before you spread your wings, as you start to ascend, roll your back slightly so that each weight falls to the ground and experience how much lighter that you feel and how effortlessly you’re flying, going higher than you thought was possible, because the emotions that were holding you back are now gone, leaving you with a much higher magnetic frequency.
For those of you who enjoy a physical challenge, you may want to take bottles of water and label them as what’s blocking your progress or whatever it is that you want to detach from. ¬†Next you would fill a backpack with those bottles of water, go for a short hike, and then stop somewhere where you can open and empty the bottles of water. ¬†Repeat that same hike that you just did and feel how much easier it is to carry on- forget¬†Red-bull, when we apply the law of detachment appropriately, it gives us wings!