Hidden Truth

For most of us who grew up in the 70′s the world of parenting was much different than today.  Another set of rules existed, growing up we had the freedom that the kids of today miss out on, it’s sad.  There was very little screen time(a good thing) and most parents sent us kids outside to run wild.  The instructions we were given were to not go further than a block, or into someones home without permission, which kept parents knowing where we were and it was simple enough for moms to stand on their front step and holler for us to come home.  No pre-arranged “play-dates” were made, if you wanted to play with a friend, you would simply ring their doorbell, this was calling on someone.  Today’s technology has created fear and laziness among youth and parents alike, it has its uses, without it where would we be, I know.

I love the imagery of the Justice card from The Housewives Tarot deck.  No groundings were issued back then, when it came time for discipline most of us were hit, either by a hand, hairbrush, spoon, whatever was handy.  It wasn’t called child abuse but spanking.  You got off easy if it was a fast one from your mom and knew that you were in real deep trouble if you were told,”Just wait ’til your father comes home!”  It wasn’t uncommon to see a mother swiftly give a smack in public either.  No one gawked in disgust at the mom, instead we all assumed that the child had deserved it.  In grade three a girl started a petition circulating among the students asking us to sign it if we wanted some one else to teach us gym.  None of us liked this teacher, he was more like a drill sergeant but we wouldn’t sign it because we were in fear of the repercussion’s.  That teacher found out and slapped that girl so hard across the face that the mark remained for the rest of the day.  Yes, he took it too far(as a teacher) and wasn’t fired but transferred quietly to a boys school the following year.  I only knew one family that didn’t believe in spanking, I spent much of my time with their daughters until about grade 6.  After school we would go over to their house where the mom would give us Oreo cookies and other delicious treats while we watched Transformers on TV which none of the other moms would ever let us do, I thought these girls really had the life.   One of them ended up having a quiet abortion at the young age of eleven.  I lost track of them after that(and slimmed down in the process) and have no idea how the rest of their adolescence was spent.

That brings me to today.  We have supposedly “better” parenting techniques and discipline usually brings a time out, or a grounding off electronics.  Most parents would never fathom the thought of spanking, myself included, deeming it to be abusive.  Many children don’t seem to have the same level of respect regarding their behavior.  When was the last time that you witnessed a child in a grocery store having a temper tantrum so massive and loud that the entire store was privy to it?  I’m willing to bet that it wasn’t that long ago.  How about the cheeky manner in which many children use when speaking to their elders?  Or the child who is aggressively insolent towards their parent and follows it up by hitting or kicking them?  Is our style of parenting today really better?  I’m starting to wonder.